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Romance or Routine...pass the salt, did you take out the trash...ohbythewayiloveyou...see you later.

Updated: Mar 14, 2022

Remembering your LOVE for each other

What was it like when you first noticed your partner?

Was it “across a crowded room”, in a Chemistry lab in college, at work, or a chance encounter in the produce isle?

There was a point when you first noticed your partner and thought to yourself “I sure would like to get to know them better”.

My guess is, that first realization was pretty memorable.

Then what?

Did you then say:

“Hi, my name is ___________ and I would love to get to know you. Please keep in mind however that once I get used to you, I won’t be near as attentive, there will be days when you’ll wonder why you’re with me and even days when you wonder if I even love you. In fact, I may give you the “SILENT TREATMENT” or withhold sex from you…want to go out on a date?”

My guess is that this is NOT what you said, and I would further speculate those thoughts never entered your mind.

I imagine you said to yourself “Wow! He/She is handsome/beautiful; I love their smile, their eyes, and the way they laugh. I like the enthusiasm they have and the way they talk. They are so well put together and look like they are good at what they do. I wonder if they’re even available…I wonder if they would go out with me?

Are they out of my league?”

Well, they DID go out with you! You got ‘em! YOU WON!!

You won…you got the DATE…do you act like you won?

Do you show your partner that you love and cherish them?

Do you show them that you want them in your life and you’re so happy they are with you and that you wouldn’t want anyone else?


Have one or the other of you taken each other for granted?

Are you in the rut of familiarity?

Was today was like yesterday, and the day before, and it’ll probably be the same tomorrow.

You know THAT rut. GROSS!

Do you want to return to the time when you couldn’t wait to see your partner again?

You couldn’t wait to be with them, to hold them, to enjoy their company, to share, to love and to learn about each other.

Would you like that?

Would you like that and more? (BTW YES!! is the correct answer:)

Do this:

1. Remember the time when you first noticed your partner. What was that like? What made you notice them? What made that person stand out from the crowd and make you want them? Close your eyes and relive that moment, FEEL again what that was like.

2. Remember the first great date you had. Why was it special? What did you two talk about, what did they wear, what funny thing happened…etc.

3. Remember the moment you first fell in love. What was it that made you fall in love with them? What was the moment that you KNEW you were in love with them? Not like, not lust but really IN LOVE with them, like you couldn’t live without them!

4. Bring into those memories all the senses you can. What were you seeing (her smile, his eyes, the crowd)? What smells were there (perfume, cologne)? How were you feeling (happy, nervous)? What music, conversation etc did you hear? Take some time and truly re-live that moment.

Make a strong solid memory of these things. Remember what it is about your partner that you love so much and what they have that no one else does. What makes them so special to YOU? Remember the loving times, the times of laughter, joy and real togetherness. Lock those memories in, feel them, close your eyes, sit still for a moment and really let those great memories sink in.

Now think of what you life would be like without your partner in it. Think of the laughter lost, the empty home, not hearing their voice, not feeling their touch. Not being with them.

Quick! Go back to happy memories!! You still have them, you haven’t lost them! They love you, and you love them, it’s not too late!!